Just admit it, you've never heard of Angband. Right? And if you have, may I hand you a cookie
why have you never mentioned it before now we could've swapped stories!Oh well. You don't WANT to play
Angband, it's way too complicated for you. Go back to Diablo where you belong. Go marvel at your "pwetty pwetty gwaphics" and all that stuff. You don't even deserve Angband. Come again? You LIKE complicated stuff? Oh, you won't like Angband then. It's way too simple for your taste. Go play
Nethack,
NERD! Go mess around with all your strange, superfluous features that unnecessarily bog down the game. Go play WITHOUT a townlevel. See if I care. Leave me and my nice, simple Angband be. Say what? You don't CARE that the graphics suck? You don't CARE that your guy is represented by an '@', that you'll get killed by a kobold shaman looking distinctly like a 'k', that your sword is just a '|', that your first dragon kill will be kinda anticlimactic because all that happens is that the the 'd' you've been fighting against disappears from the screen? Well, ok, maybe you'll like Angband.
WHAT?? TIPS? You want TIPS? You want help starting out? Listen, dumbass, you're way too stupid for this game. Honestly. Sheesh. Oh well, can't be helped... For your first character, play a warrior. Maybe a human one, maybe a dwarf, half-orc or half-troll. Especially the half-troll will suit you, because
he's just as ugly as you are!Yeah yeah, you're dead, I know. And now you whine because when you load your savegame, you just get the character creation screen. Let me tell you something, smacktard: That character is DEAD. DEAD AS A DOORNAIL, as Dickens, the fruitcaek, would've said. There's no second chances in Angband. Saving is just for starting out again where you left off the night before because YOU COULDN'T HANDLE THE HEAT! Once you die, your savefile gets flagged as dead, and your character is GONE, ok? Use the savefile to start over again though, because you'll keep your monster memory. Yeah, that's where the game keeps a record of the pitifully few foes you have vanquished, and what you know about 'em. AS IF YOU KNEW ANYTHING ANYWAY.
STUCK AGAIN? Yeah, can't say I'm surprised. You know, if you hit '?', there's help files you could consult INSTEAD OF BOTHERING ME!
You know, if you ever get used to this game (I doubt it), there's an option menu you can play around with by hitting the '=' key. But you can't handle all those options anyway.
Geez, these nubs nowadays. Talk to me again when you've reached 250 feet alive, okay?
Let's see if this reverse psychology stuff works as advertised.
Topic: Angband (Read 5277 times)
